Sorry to be posting a short story right after posting the first chapter to a new tale, but I am doing it anyway. I fell asleep a couple of hours ago and had, you guessed it, a nightmare. This one was worthy of short-story-attude. I am also including no dialogue whatsoever. Here it is, I proudly present, Black Ice.
The car pulls up, and the snow begins to fall just like magic. There is something about it that will always be pretty and soft. Each flake is like a falling angel. The sky is only beginning to fade into darkness. The entire scene is picturesque; sun setting in the back, leafless trees laden heavy with crystalline drops, and that car.
Climbing into the passenger seat of that car is always comforting. The seat is wide and soft, plenty of room for my boots to slide to the floor and my feet to tuck up next to my body. The heat is turned all the way up to protect our shivering bones from the chilling wind outside. I tuck into the seat and lean into the window as the car speeds away from what once was.
Trees, snow, ice, lights, and memories rush past in a dizzy blur. My eyes close and a tear falls, unnoticed. Sudden pressure on my hand, not quite unnoticed. Eye contact, and then before anything can be processed, impact. The car swerves in a panic. Control is out of the question as the vehicle spins wildly despite the application of breaks. The spinning finally halts but the terror is not yet over. All that's known is fear, panic, and shear animal instinct when the second impact comes from another uncontrollable car. The sound comes in a deafening, screeching crash. Strong arms wrap around my body and I feel another torso covering my own just moments before the metal folds in on itself. The pain is only present for a moment, then numbness engulfs everything. The heart is immune, and with the last bit of strength I can muster I reach above me to feel my world crash and burn. I blink twice, seeing nothing but red, thinking of nothing but how I was seen as a thing worth risk. My eyes close and do not reopen.
Tuesday, October 5, 2010
Tuesday, September 21, 2010
North of Somewhere [1]
My mother is somewhere, somewhere that isn't here. Somewhere has never been here, and I have always been here. Papa says that when he was younger, he prayed for a daughter. He told me that one day the angels decided to fulfill his prayers. Papa says an angle brought me here, that she gave me to him out of the goodness of her heart. He told me how she didn't really want to let me go, how she asked for five more minutes in return for a lifetime. That was the day I was born. I was in her arms for all of five minutes before she was gone. I used to ask where she was and why she never came back for me. Papa always had a hard time answering that. The truth is, he never really knew. After a while I stopped asking about her, because after a while I just stopped caring.
Here, to get specific, is a little house surrounded by big trees up in North Conway. This is where my mother left me the day I was born, and this is where I stayed. I have never wanted to be anywhere else nor have I ever really been anywhere else. I am content where I am, doing what I do. I go to school, to dance class, and home. I would go out, if I had friends to go out with. Sometimes papa takes me shopping, but not too often. He works while I'm at school and dance. He picks me up on his way home and we talk. I don't really know how much normal girls share with their fathers, but I do know that we share more. When all you've got is each other, you don't really leave much out.
Every day after I do my homework, papa sits down and plays the most beautiful piano pieces anyone has ever heard. He doesn't need sheet music or any direction, my papa plays from his heart. Sometimes he watches me dance for him, other times he gets so absorbed in the music that everything else just doesn't seem to exist to him anymore. When that happens, it's my turn to watch him. I want to be able to do that, have something capture my soul so completely that I don't even notice that the world is spinning. Once when I was four I got upset because papa wasn't watching me dance. When I asked him why, he told me I inspired him.
My name is Musetta Hope. It means little muse in french, which is papa's first language. He tells me that I inspire hope, so therefore there was no better name for me.
Papa has always loved me, always given me everything I need and most of what I want. Things weren't always good like they are now though. When I was six, all I wanted was a barbie doll. Not just any barbie, a Disney princess barbie. That was also the year that papa had trouble finding work. When my birthday came around, there was no barbie. Papa tried though, he made me something else. He had taken one of my old dresses and turned it into a stuffed bunny rabbit. It wasn't really well made, and it only barely resembled a bunny, but I think that bunny was better than every single barbie in the world.
The truth is, he tries his best, but sometimes it isn't enough. There was a time when we wouldn't always have dinner. That was the year he planted a garden. We grow pumpkins, potatoes, lettuce, tomatoes, cucumbers, and carrots. That helped a lot, but when winter came it took all the vegetables with it. Papa knew we had to eat, so he turned the heat off. We had to wear all our sweaters and blankets, but it was worh it. He ended up cutting down one of the big trees in the woods. We would sit next to the fire every night and he would read to me. Most nights, I fell asleep in his lap.
I was never unhappy, never mad at him for having us live like that. I never knew that things were supposed to be different. Sometimes I do wish it was more than just the two of us. Every girl needs a woman in her life, to teach her how to be a lady. I say that I don't care what happened to my mother, and I really don't, but sometimes, I wish I knew where somewhere was.
Here, to get specific, is a little house surrounded by big trees up in North Conway. This is where my mother left me the day I was born, and this is where I stayed. I have never wanted to be anywhere else nor have I ever really been anywhere else. I am content where I am, doing what I do. I go to school, to dance class, and home. I would go out, if I had friends to go out with. Sometimes papa takes me shopping, but not too often. He works while I'm at school and dance. He picks me up on his way home and we talk. I don't really know how much normal girls share with their fathers, but I do know that we share more. When all you've got is each other, you don't really leave much out.
Every day after I do my homework, papa sits down and plays the most beautiful piano pieces anyone has ever heard. He doesn't need sheet music or any direction, my papa plays from his heart. Sometimes he watches me dance for him, other times he gets so absorbed in the music that everything else just doesn't seem to exist to him anymore. When that happens, it's my turn to watch him. I want to be able to do that, have something capture my soul so completely that I don't even notice that the world is spinning. Once when I was four I got upset because papa wasn't watching me dance. When I asked him why, he told me I inspired him.
My name is Musetta Hope. It means little muse in french, which is papa's first language. He tells me that I inspire hope, so therefore there was no better name for me.
Papa has always loved me, always given me everything I need and most of what I want. Things weren't always good like they are now though. When I was six, all I wanted was a barbie doll. Not just any barbie, a Disney princess barbie. That was also the year that papa had trouble finding work. When my birthday came around, there was no barbie. Papa tried though, he made me something else. He had taken one of my old dresses and turned it into a stuffed bunny rabbit. It wasn't really well made, and it only barely resembled a bunny, but I think that bunny was better than every single barbie in the world.
The truth is, he tries his best, but sometimes it isn't enough. There was a time when we wouldn't always have dinner. That was the year he planted a garden. We grow pumpkins, potatoes, lettuce, tomatoes, cucumbers, and carrots. That helped a lot, but when winter came it took all the vegetables with it. Papa knew we had to eat, so he turned the heat off. We had to wear all our sweaters and blankets, but it was worh it. He ended up cutting down one of the big trees in the woods. We would sit next to the fire every night and he would read to me. Most nights, I fell asleep in his lap.
I was never unhappy, never mad at him for having us live like that. I never knew that things were supposed to be different. Sometimes I do wish it was more than just the two of us. Every girl needs a woman in her life, to teach her how to be a lady. I say that I don't care what happened to my mother, and I really don't, but sometimes, I wish I knew where somewhere was.
Sunday, September 19, 2010
Forgetting - Part 16 [final chapter]
I'm not sure what I'm supposed to remember. My childhood? That's long gone. What do you want from me? My life story? That's not even possible anymore. I can only remember little things, unimportant things. I can remember wearing a red hat on the day of my brother's graduation, but nothing else. I can vividly see the shoes I wore to prom but can't remember who I went with. I can remember every word of a note I got from my best friend the day I got to college, but where I went and for what is a dizzy blur. I know I should know these things, but I just don't. What's wrong with me?
Wednesday, September 8, 2010
Forgetting - Part 15
"Julia? Thank God you're alright!"
"Mom? What the hell?"
"You were hit by a taxi. You don't have any brain trauma so don't try to pull that amnesia crap. Talk to your mother or you'll be going straight to hell." The nurse gives me a stern look and walks away, shouting, "Jesus is watching!"
"Honey, where have you been? Your bank account was cancelled, you haven't talked to me in months. I already lost one daughter, isn't that enough?"
"Please, not you too! I'm still myself! Why can't anyone see that?"
"Are you trying to be funny?" Tears are begining to glisten in my mother's eyes.
"Mom, I'm your only daughter." At this she starts weeping. "What?" I'm defensive now.
"It's like you don't even see what you've done to this family. We needed you Julia. While you were busy doing whatever the hell you want, not even bothering to call your mother, we needed you."
"Mom, I didn't..." But I trail off, unsure of what to say. A moment passes in silence.
"Your father left."
"Daddy? But, no!"
"You missed your brother's wedding. I bet if this little accident hadn't happened, you wouldn't have known about the niece you'll have in a few months."
I pick up the closest thing to me, a flower vase, and throw it at my mother. I miss but I begin to scream. "Stop it! Stop making me feel like I'm nothing! I've felt that way for months and months! I don't have a home, mother. I was ashamed. I didn't think you'd want me."
"Why would you ever think that we would throw you out, not help you when you needed it? That's what family is for. Don't you remember how we were there for Kim?"
I stare at her, a puzzled expression plastered on my face. "Who is Kim?"
"Don't play games with me Julia, it was hard enough to see her in trouble and harder still to loose her. Just, don't. Please."
"I'm not playing games. Who is Kim?"
My mother gets up and walks out the door.
"Who's Kim? Mom?" I shout after her.
In a moment the nurse comes back in and my mother is wiping away more tears. The nurse is shaking her head at me in disaproval.
"Honey, who is your sister and where is she now?"
"I've never had a sister. Right mom?"
She starts crying again and says softly, "I'm loosing another one." She turns away and says louder, "Do it. Put her in the therapy. I don't care. She's gone, just like her twin."
"Mom? What the hell?"
"You were hit by a taxi. You don't have any brain trauma so don't try to pull that amnesia crap. Talk to your mother or you'll be going straight to hell." The nurse gives me a stern look and walks away, shouting, "Jesus is watching!"
"Honey, where have you been? Your bank account was cancelled, you haven't talked to me in months. I already lost one daughter, isn't that enough?"
"Please, not you too! I'm still myself! Why can't anyone see that?"
"Are you trying to be funny?" Tears are begining to glisten in my mother's eyes.
"Mom, I'm your only daughter." At this she starts weeping. "What?" I'm defensive now.
"It's like you don't even see what you've done to this family. We needed you Julia. While you were busy doing whatever the hell you want, not even bothering to call your mother, we needed you."
"Mom, I didn't..." But I trail off, unsure of what to say. A moment passes in silence.
"Your father left."
"Daddy? But, no!"
"You missed your brother's wedding. I bet if this little accident hadn't happened, you wouldn't have known about the niece you'll have in a few months."
I pick up the closest thing to me, a flower vase, and throw it at my mother. I miss but I begin to scream. "Stop it! Stop making me feel like I'm nothing! I've felt that way for months and months! I don't have a home, mother. I was ashamed. I didn't think you'd want me."
"Why would you ever think that we would throw you out, not help you when you needed it? That's what family is for. Don't you remember how we were there for Kim?"
I stare at her, a puzzled expression plastered on my face. "Who is Kim?"
"Don't play games with me Julia, it was hard enough to see her in trouble and harder still to loose her. Just, don't. Please."
"I'm not playing games. Who is Kim?"
My mother gets up and walks out the door.
"Who's Kim? Mom?" I shout after her.
In a moment the nurse comes back in and my mother is wiping away more tears. The nurse is shaking her head at me in disaproval.
"Honey, who is your sister and where is she now?"
"I've never had a sister. Right mom?"
She starts crying again and says softly, "I'm loosing another one." She turns away and says louder, "Do it. Put her in the therapy. I don't care. She's gone, just like her twin."
Monday, September 6, 2010
Forgetting - Part 14
Six Months Later
I know I woke up late because the sun is high in the sky. I pack up my stuff quickly and start running. The thing is, the money ran out a few months ago, even after I sold all of my stuff. I am running from a bench in the park to the soup kitchen, hoping that I'm not too late for breakfast.
I didn't tell anyone about my current situation. I haven't spoken to anyone in a long time. My glasses got lost somewhere along the way and I can't see for shit.
"Excuse me, sir?"
All I get is a disgusted look before he turns his back on me.
"Maim?"
"Yes?" She looks mildly appauled.
"What time is it?"
"It's 10:27"
Shit. "Thank you."
I walk slowly to a new spot in the park and sit. The kitchen stops serving at eleven. I can't believe my life. I can't remember anything before I got to college, I burst into tears every time I see a baby or a book store, and I'm living on the street. I bet I could live with that, if there was anyone else to go through it with. Nobody sees me, the people on the streets look through me or around me. I am not important to anyone's life. What is the point of living when there is nobody to live life with?
I leave my things on the bench and start running again. I'm running for no reason, other than to try to escape this person I've become. I can hear the people shouting, finally noticing, but for once I'm the one that doesn't see anything. I feel it though. I feel a sharp stab and then nothing. I am an empty shell.
I know I woke up late because the sun is high in the sky. I pack up my stuff quickly and start running. The thing is, the money ran out a few months ago, even after I sold all of my stuff. I am running from a bench in the park to the soup kitchen, hoping that I'm not too late for breakfast.
I didn't tell anyone about my current situation. I haven't spoken to anyone in a long time. My glasses got lost somewhere along the way and I can't see for shit.
"Excuse me, sir?"
All I get is a disgusted look before he turns his back on me.
"Maim?"
"Yes?" She looks mildly appauled.
"What time is it?"
"It's 10:27"
Shit. "Thank you."
I walk slowly to a new spot in the park and sit. The kitchen stops serving at eleven. I can't believe my life. I can't remember anything before I got to college, I burst into tears every time I see a baby or a book store, and I'm living on the street. I bet I could live with that, if there was anyone else to go through it with. Nobody sees me, the people on the streets look through me or around me. I am not important to anyone's life. What is the point of living when there is nobody to live life with?
I leave my things on the bench and start running again. I'm running for no reason, other than to try to escape this person I've become. I can hear the people shouting, finally noticing, but for once I'm the one that doesn't see anything. I feel it though. I feel a sharp stab and then nothing. I am an empty shell.
Forgetting - Part 13
"But Eric, I need a place to stay!"
"I said no."
"I'm your sister! You can't do this to me!"
"You aren't my sister anymore. If you need a place to stay so bad, call mom."
"I can't go back home."
"Why not?"
"I don't, it's complicated, okay."
"Sure."
"Please, Eric."
I stand at the phone booth listening to nothing for a while before I hear a click and know that instead of answering me, my own brother decided to turn his back on me. I can't go home because the truth is, I don't remember home. My childhood is slipping away and growing more and more faint every day.
I end up checking in to a cheap motel for the night, but I don't really have a job and my bank account is running low. I have two options, go home and beg for money, or get a job. Going home isn't an option, but who would want to hire a drop-out? Nobody. I go to sleep with a certain sense of unease and fear, not knowing what tomorrow will bring.
"I said no."
"I'm your sister! You can't do this to me!"
"You aren't my sister anymore. If you need a place to stay so bad, call mom."
"I can't go back home."
"Why not?"
"I don't, it's complicated, okay."
"Sure."
"Please, Eric."
I stand at the phone booth listening to nothing for a while before I hear a click and know that instead of answering me, my own brother decided to turn his back on me. I can't go home because the truth is, I don't remember home. My childhood is slipping away and growing more and more faint every day.
I end up checking in to a cheap motel for the night, but I don't really have a job and my bank account is running low. I have two options, go home and beg for money, or get a job. Going home isn't an option, but who would want to hire a drop-out? Nobody. I go to sleep with a certain sense of unease and fear, not knowing what tomorrow will bring.
Thursday, August 19, 2010
Forgetting - Part 12
Three months later
“Thank you so much for this Ellie” I say as I drop my bag on her guest bed.
“You haven’t talked to anyone have you?” She’s standing in the doorway and giving me a look that clearly shows just how ashamed she is.
“No, but I read that note all the time.” I try to change the subject. “What color is your contact case because I don’t want to get ours mixed up.”
“What happened to Jules?”
“What do you mean Ellie? I’m Jules.”
“I mean what happened to the Julia I knew, the girl that was my best friend?”
“We’re still best friends, aren’t we?”
“Contacts? Partying every night? Flunking out of school? When was the last time you even read a novel?” She looks appalled with me.
“I don’t know. Does it matter?”
“Does it matter? Listen to yourself Jules! You were going to be a writer! You were going to be like Dickens or Salinger! You were going to be one of the greats. Now what’s important to you? An illegal drink with the hottest guy in the room and what? Trying to get in his pants later?”
“What are you trying to say?”
“You’re being irresponsible and childish! If I didn’t know any better I’d say, well…”
“What! What would you say?” I’m screaming at her now and I can tell she’s intimidated.
“Well I’d say it was Julia who died, and Kim who flunked out of school. You buried yourself and are trying to be your sister.”
“I don’t have a sister.” I push past her toward the front door. “I can find somewhere else to stay.”
“Thank you so much for this Ellie” I say as I drop my bag on her guest bed.
“You haven’t talked to anyone have you?” She’s standing in the doorway and giving me a look that clearly shows just how ashamed she is.
“No, but I read that note all the time.” I try to change the subject. “What color is your contact case because I don’t want to get ours mixed up.”
“What happened to Jules?”
“What do you mean Ellie? I’m Jules.”
“I mean what happened to the Julia I knew, the girl that was my best friend?”
“We’re still best friends, aren’t we?”
“Contacts? Partying every night? Flunking out of school? When was the last time you even read a novel?” She looks appalled with me.
“I don’t know. Does it matter?”
“Does it matter? Listen to yourself Jules! You were going to be a writer! You were going to be like Dickens or Salinger! You were going to be one of the greats. Now what’s important to you? An illegal drink with the hottest guy in the room and what? Trying to get in his pants later?”
“What are you trying to say?”
“You’re being irresponsible and childish! If I didn’t know any better I’d say, well…”
“What! What would you say?” I’m screaming at her now and I can tell she’s intimidated.
“Well I’d say it was Julia who died, and Kim who flunked out of school. You buried yourself and are trying to be your sister.”
“I don’t have a sister.” I push past her toward the front door. “I can find somewhere else to stay.”
Forgetting - Part 11
One Year Later
I arrive in my Harvard dorm after the first day of classes and pick up a letter my best friend wrote me.
Dear Julia,
Honey, I'm worried about you. The last time I saw you, you were in a bar and drinking. You're nineteen! I saw you leave with that guy too. You didn't even know him. The only other time I've seen you this year was at the hospital. I still don't understand why you weren't with your mom. She was really sick and your dad and I had to go looking for you. When I found you in the maternity ward, you were acting so strange. It's like your mind was in a different universe looking at those babies. I hear you've been going out every night, parties and concerts. I think you need to talk to someone. You just haven't been right for a while. I say it because I care. Please talk to someone.
Sincerely,
Ellie
I drop the letter on my bed and take a red dress out of my closet. I pair it with some stellar black pumps and twist my hair up into a bun. In moments I'm out the door, letter forgotten and ready to party until four in the morning.
I arrive in my Harvard dorm after the first day of classes and pick up a letter my best friend wrote me.
Dear Julia,
Honey, I'm worried about you. The last time I saw you, you were in a bar and drinking. You're nineteen! I saw you leave with that guy too. You didn't even know him. The only other time I've seen you this year was at the hospital. I still don't understand why you weren't with your mom. She was really sick and your dad and I had to go looking for you. When I found you in the maternity ward, you were acting so strange. It's like your mind was in a different universe looking at those babies. I hear you've been going out every night, parties and concerts. I think you need to talk to someone. You just haven't been right for a while. I say it because I care. Please talk to someone.
Sincerely,
Ellie
I drop the letter on my bed and take a red dress out of my closet. I pair it with some stellar black pumps and twist my hair up into a bun. In moments I'm out the door, letter forgotten and ready to party until four in the morning.
Thursday, August 12, 2010
Forgetting - Part 10
It's one week later and I'm beside my parents and brother dressed all in black. My mother can't stop crying, my father is as cold and distant as rock, and Eric looks as if he may explode any minute. I have no idea how I look. A mess probably. I can't tell if I'm crying anymore. An indescribable emptiness fills my soul as I stare without blinking at the stone that marks my anguish.
Kimberly Anne Brook
1990-2008
-Who wants flowers when you're dead? Nobody. -
It's as if half of me is missing, half of me is dead. The quote was Kim's favourite part of Catcher in the Rye. She would always read that paragraph out loud, no matter if anyone was around to hear or not.
I'm upset because there is no mention anywhere of the kid she would have had. Not on the stone, not at the funeral service or the wake. Jesse didn't even show up. They talked about her college acceptance, about how tragically young she died, and even about how she loved to film her life. They didn't say that she had ecclampsia, which triggered the seizure that killed her. They never said she died because of the baby. To everyone else, there never was a baby.
Kimberly Anne Brook
1990-2008
-Who wants flowers when you're dead? Nobody. -
It's as if half of me is missing, half of me is dead. The quote was Kim's favourite part of Catcher in the Rye. She would always read that paragraph out loud, no matter if anyone was around to hear or not.
I'm upset because there is no mention anywhere of the kid she would have had. Not on the stone, not at the funeral service or the wake. Jesse didn't even show up. They talked about her college acceptance, about how tragically young she died, and even about how she loved to film her life. They didn't say that she had ecclampsia, which triggered the seizure that killed her. They never said she died because of the baby. To everyone else, there never was a baby.
Saturday, August 7, 2010
Forgetting - Part 9
I'm in the kitchen making breakfast when Kim comes in with a video camera.
"At fifteen weeks into the expansion of my stomach and the delay of our ivy league learning," She announces to the camera. "I am extremely hungry. We see darling Julia cooking and hoping that there is something in that pan for the unfortunate sister." She gives me a pouty puppy-dog face.
"Mommy has to help." I say right into the lens.
"See how she abuses me?"
"Get yourself some eggs!"
"Already have, and now I have a chick."
"Very funny. Do you want to make your own breakfast?"
"Fine, you win." She puts the camera down on the counter and goes into the fridge for her eggs. She walks toward me and the stove and then suddenly stops and drops the eggs. I turn around with every intention of yelling at her, but then I see what's happening. It's not like slow motion at all, it happens fast. In a second she is down on the ground, shaking and convulsing. She starts screaming and writhing in pain. I drop to the ground next to her and before I know it, I'm yelling too.
"What's wrong Kim? What's going on? I don't understand, I don't understand!"
I look around for anything I think might help, but theres nothing. Then I see the phone.
"911, what is your emergency?"
"My sister, I think it's a seizure. Oh God, I need an ambulance! I need an ambulance!"
"Mam, please stay calm we tracked your call and we are sending help. They will be there as soon as they can."
"She's pregnant! What about the baby?"
"Mam, you have to wait for the ambulance to get to you. Please stay calm."
Kim lets out a scream louder than all the others. I throw the phone across the room and watch it break as it hits the wall. Why is nobody else home? Kim passes out and I'm crying and screaming when the ambulance gets here. I look up and notice that everything that has passed has been caught on tape.
"At fifteen weeks into the expansion of my stomach and the delay of our ivy league learning," She announces to the camera. "I am extremely hungry. We see darling Julia cooking and hoping that there is something in that pan for the unfortunate sister." She gives me a pouty puppy-dog face.
"Mommy has to help." I say right into the lens.
"See how she abuses me?"
"Get yourself some eggs!"
"Already have, and now I have a chick."
"Very funny. Do you want to make your own breakfast?"
"Fine, you win." She puts the camera down on the counter and goes into the fridge for her eggs. She walks toward me and the stove and then suddenly stops and drops the eggs. I turn around with every intention of yelling at her, but then I see what's happening. It's not like slow motion at all, it happens fast. In a second she is down on the ground, shaking and convulsing. She starts screaming and writhing in pain. I drop to the ground next to her and before I know it, I'm yelling too.
"What's wrong Kim? What's going on? I don't understand, I don't understand!"
I look around for anything I think might help, but theres nothing. Then I see the phone.
"911, what is your emergency?"
"My sister, I think it's a seizure. Oh God, I need an ambulance! I need an ambulance!"
"Mam, please stay calm we tracked your call and we are sending help. They will be there as soon as they can."
"She's pregnant! What about the baby?"
"Mam, you have to wait for the ambulance to get to you. Please stay calm."
Kim lets out a scream louder than all the others. I throw the phone across the room and watch it break as it hits the wall. Why is nobody else home? Kim passes out and I'm crying and screaming when the ambulance gets here. I look up and notice that everything that has passed has been caught on tape.
Tuesday, August 3, 2010
Forgetting - Part 8
It has been about a month. Dad wanted to cut off Jesse's penis and mom went out and bought a car seat. Jesse, however, tried to run. He left town for two weeks before his mom found him and threatened him. She told him that if he doesn't help, then she will light his testicals on fire so he may have no more spawn. I'm not too sure why there is this sudden facination with Jesse's privates, but I have decided to stay out of it.
I wake up first as the sunlight peaks through the blinds and falls across my face. Kim is curled up on her side facing me. I look at her intently. She seems so innocent and child like. A strand of her hair is curled around her delicate little pinky. Her mouth is slightly open and I can tell she's dreaming. She opens her eyes slowly. I look at the clock and notice I have been starring at my sister for and hour.
"Goodmorning." She yawns.
"Happy birthday."
"Tell me sister, how does it feel to be adult?" She asks me in a phony Brittish accent and her nose in the air.
"Quite excellant dear sister. And you as well?" I copy her voice.
"I can feel the wrinkles setting in already."
We giggle and our mother enters with two cartons of Ben & Jerry's. Kim's is always Brownie Batter and mine will always be New York Super Fudge Chunk. We both get on the floor next to our mother, still smiling.
"And to think, it had been eighteen years since I was in this exact same position! Screaming and crying and..."
"Begging for the epidural." Kim and I say in unison. She has done the same routine every year.
"And to think, soon it will be my baby."
I look over and see the hump that is Kim's belly. She is attempting to balance her ice cream on it.
"Twenty-seven weeks to go." She puts her hand on her forehead and closes her eyes.
"What is it?" I ask.
"Just a headache. Nothing major Jules." She reassures me.
We finish our birthday breakfast, get money from mom and decide to go shopping. We go to the maternaty store for Kim first.
"Hey, this one would look great on you!" Kim tells me.
"Yeah, except I'm not the pregnant one, remember? Besides, we're identical. If it would look good on me it would look good on you."
"I guess so, but it doesn't look like it's maternaty. You should try it anyway."
I look over at her to see a bright green dress. It really isn't bad. It's actually kind of cute. It's a babydoll cut and there are white flowers on the bottom.
"Maybe I will try it." I take it from her and go to the dressing room. Kim follows me and knocks her head on the dressing room door. "Good job Kimmie."
"Shut up, I didn't see it there." She's bliking a ton and swaying back and forth on the spot.
"Are you okay Kim?"
"Fine. I just need a nap I think. Can we go home?"
I look at the dress, then at her. "Come on, let's go."
I wake up first as the sunlight peaks through the blinds and falls across my face. Kim is curled up on her side facing me. I look at her intently. She seems so innocent and child like. A strand of her hair is curled around her delicate little pinky. Her mouth is slightly open and I can tell she's dreaming. She opens her eyes slowly. I look at the clock and notice I have been starring at my sister for and hour.
"Goodmorning." She yawns.
"Happy birthday."
"Tell me sister, how does it feel to be adult?" She asks me in a phony Brittish accent and her nose in the air.
"Quite excellant dear sister. And you as well?" I copy her voice.
"I can feel the wrinkles setting in already."
We giggle and our mother enters with two cartons of Ben & Jerry's. Kim's is always Brownie Batter and mine will always be New York Super Fudge Chunk. We both get on the floor next to our mother, still smiling.
"And to think, it had been eighteen years since I was in this exact same position! Screaming and crying and..."
"Begging for the epidural." Kim and I say in unison. She has done the same routine every year.
"And to think, soon it will be my baby."
I look over and see the hump that is Kim's belly. She is attempting to balance her ice cream on it.
"Twenty-seven weeks to go." She puts her hand on her forehead and closes her eyes.
"What is it?" I ask.
"Just a headache. Nothing major Jules." She reassures me.
We finish our birthday breakfast, get money from mom and decide to go shopping. We go to the maternaty store for Kim first.
"Hey, this one would look great on you!" Kim tells me.
"Yeah, except I'm not the pregnant one, remember? Besides, we're identical. If it would look good on me it would look good on you."
"I guess so, but it doesn't look like it's maternaty. You should try it anyway."
I look over at her to see a bright green dress. It really isn't bad. It's actually kind of cute. It's a babydoll cut and there are white flowers on the bottom.
"Maybe I will try it." I take it from her and go to the dressing room. Kim follows me and knocks her head on the dressing room door. "Good job Kimmie."
"Shut up, I didn't see it there." She's bliking a ton and swaying back and forth on the spot.
"Are you okay Kim?"
"Fine. I just need a nap I think. Can we go home?"
I look at the dress, then at her. "Come on, let's go."
Monday, July 19, 2010
Forgetting - Part 7
I walk into the clinic moments after Kim, but all she's doing is standing there in the middle of the office. I tap her on the shoulder and point to the reception desk. She takes a breath and walks up to the desk.
"Do you have an appointment?" The chick behind the desk asks skeptically.
"Um," Kim looks at me. "Yes."
"Name?" She stares at Kim. She seems to melt under the glance.
"Kimberly Brook." She says without thinking.
I nudge her and give her a look as if to say aloud, "Don't you remember your fake name?"
"I'm sorry, that name isn't here. You can make an appointment to come in another time if you want."
"No thank you. I think I will go home and never come back." She says and she books it out of the office like she was in mortal danger.
I run after her and catch her in the parking lot. This time I have the upper hand, the keys.
"Hey! Where do you think you're going?"
"Home."
"What about this?"
"This? What this?" She has a crazed, frantic look in her eye.
I put my hand on her stomach and say very slowly, "This."
"Oh, that."
"It wont magically go away Kim."
"I know but, well..."
"Well what?"
She takes a breath. "Well you were right! I'm running away when it should be my responsibility. I'm the one who got into this mess in the first place and it does have a beating heart after all." She puts her hands on her stomach and breaths deeply. "It's mine."
"Do you have an appointment?" The chick behind the desk asks skeptically.
"Um," Kim looks at me. "Yes."
"Name?" She stares at Kim. She seems to melt under the glance.
"Kimberly Brook." She says without thinking.
I nudge her and give her a look as if to say aloud, "Don't you remember your fake name?"
"I'm sorry, that name isn't here. You can make an appointment to come in another time if you want."
"No thank you. I think I will go home and never come back." She says and she books it out of the office like she was in mortal danger.
I run after her and catch her in the parking lot. This time I have the upper hand, the keys.
"Hey! Where do you think you're going?"
"Home."
"What about this?"
"This? What this?" She has a crazed, frantic look in her eye.
I put my hand on her stomach and say very slowly, "This."
"Oh, that."
"It wont magically go away Kim."
"I know but, well..."
"Well what?"
She takes a breath. "Well you were right! I'm running away when it should be my responsibility. I'm the one who got into this mess in the first place and it does have a beating heart after all." She puts her hands on her stomach and breaths deeply. "It's mine."
I put my hand on her shoulder and she looks at me. She actually has the balls to smile right now. Just another reason for me to admire her. Thanks.
"So when will you tell Jesse?"
The smile vanishes. "When it feels right."
"Kim, come on. You have to tell him soon. It's his too."
"You're right."
"And what about mom and dad?"
"I'll tell them if they notice."
"Kim."
"Or when it feels right." I shoot her a look. "Or when they get home."
"Are you sure you can do this? We can go back inside and get it done."
"No. I almost made a huge mistake Jules. I need to do this, I can feel it. Something is going to happen, just wait and see. It's going to be huge."
I believe it, but for some reason I am terrified of what will happen.
Sunday, July 11, 2010
Forgetting - Part 6
"Hi. I need to set up an abortion as quickly as possible." I tell the woman on the other end of the line.
"How old are you?"
"Seventeen."
"You'll need parent consent."
"I'm sorry, I can't do that." I hang up the phone yet again. We don't have the time to wait for our birthday in three weeks, neither of us know when it would be too late. This was the third clinic I have called today that won't let us come in without parent consent.
"Hey, try this one." Kim throws a page of the newspaper at me with a small add highlighted.
I read it out loud. "Free woman's clinic for all ages and personal problems. Counseling available. Call today, continue your life tomorrow." I look up at her. "This one seems a lot sketchier than the other ones. Are you sure you want to try it?"
"How much you wanna bet they ask for parent permission?" She throws back at me.
I pick the phone up again and dial the number.
"Hello?" I can tell the receptionist is smacking gum.
"Hi, I need an abortion and fast."
"How old are you?"
"Seventeen."
"We have an opening today at five. Can you make that?"
I look at my watch. It's only three - thirty. "Yes."
"Name?"
"Kira Heaven." I say the fake name Kim chose.
"Alright. You're on for five."
"Great. Thank you so..." She hangs up the phone before I finish my sentence. "Come on, we have to find this place."
We get in the car and drive in silence. I glance at her every few seconds.
"Kimmie?" I ask after a long time of nothing but driving.
"Mmm?"
"How did this happen?"
"It was a mistake. I really don't want to talk about it Jules."
"Okay."
We only spend another five minutes at most in silence. We pull into a shady apartment complex.
"Are you sure this is the right place?" Kim asks hesitantly.
"Yep." I point to the sign with the offices in the building. They include a tatoo parler, a clothing boutique, a beauty school, and the free clinic. "Come on. You're the one who wants to do this."
"I don't want to, I need to."
"Do you really need to though?"
"Yes I do. I'll be at college in the fall. I won't have time for a kid and I don't deserve to ruin my body just to give the thing to someone else."
"Thing? It's not a toy it's a child!"
"Not yet. It's not going to be a child. It will never get that far."
"It's heart is beating Kim. It's alive and it can't fight or speak up for itself. It's helpless and it's yours and you don't care."
"And you do? You made the appointment! You drove! You're just as bad as I am Julia!"
We both stand in the parking lot facing each other, not speaking. She makes the first move and she goes inside the building. I look back at the car and then follow her. Yep, I love her.
"How old are you?"
"Seventeen."
"You'll need parent consent."
"I'm sorry, I can't do that." I hang up the phone yet again. We don't have the time to wait for our birthday in three weeks, neither of us know when it would be too late. This was the third clinic I have called today that won't let us come in without parent consent.
"Hey, try this one." Kim throws a page of the newspaper at me with a small add highlighted.
I read it out loud. "Free woman's clinic for all ages and personal problems. Counseling available. Call today, continue your life tomorrow." I look up at her. "This one seems a lot sketchier than the other ones. Are you sure you want to try it?"
"How much you wanna bet they ask for parent permission?" She throws back at me.
I pick the phone up again and dial the number.
"Hello?" I can tell the receptionist is smacking gum.
"Hi, I need an abortion and fast."
"How old are you?"
"Seventeen."
"We have an opening today at five. Can you make that?"
I look at my watch. It's only three - thirty. "Yes."
"Name?"
"Kira Heaven." I say the fake name Kim chose.
"Alright. You're on for five."
"Great. Thank you so..." She hangs up the phone before I finish my sentence. "Come on, we have to find this place."
We get in the car and drive in silence. I glance at her every few seconds.
"Kimmie?" I ask after a long time of nothing but driving.
"Mmm?"
"How did this happen?"
"It was a mistake. I really don't want to talk about it Jules."
"Okay."
We only spend another five minutes at most in silence. We pull into a shady apartment complex.
"Are you sure this is the right place?" Kim asks hesitantly.
"Yep." I point to the sign with the offices in the building. They include a tatoo parler, a clothing boutique, a beauty school, and the free clinic. "Come on. You're the one who wants to do this."
"I don't want to, I need to."
"Do you really need to though?"
"Yes I do. I'll be at college in the fall. I won't have time for a kid and I don't deserve to ruin my body just to give the thing to someone else."
"Thing? It's not a toy it's a child!"
"Not yet. It's not going to be a child. It will never get that far."
"It's heart is beating Kim. It's alive and it can't fight or speak up for itself. It's helpless and it's yours and you don't care."
"And you do? You made the appointment! You drove! You're just as bad as I am Julia!"
We both stand in the parking lot facing each other, not speaking. She makes the first move and she goes inside the building. I look back at the car and then follow her. Yep, I love her.
Wednesday, June 30, 2010
Forgetting - Part 5
"What the hell are you doing? Stop it, Kim, stop it!" I jump on her and we start fighting. She may not look it, but she can sure throw a punch.
"Why me? Why now?" She yelled.
"You're the one beating the crap out of yourself!"
"This shouldn't have happened. I don't understand!"
"What don't you understand?"
"Get off of me damn it! I need to do this!"
“Do what? I don’t understand what you’re trying to say Kim!”
“Just leave me alone Julia! I don’t need anyone!”
I punch her face and she stops the frantic fight. Her lip is bleeding but she doesn’t look like she cares.
“Tell me what the hell is going on.” I demand after a few seconds of silence.
“Nothing.”
“Liar.”
“Fine.”
I wait for her to go on but she doesn’t. “Well?”
“I’m not sure…I don’t know…it’s weird but I guess…” She keeps trailing off the end of sentences.
“What? Tell me. Trust me. Come on. You used to tell me everything. You can still talk to me. Talk. Kim. Talk.”
I can see that I’m pressuring her and she finally snaps shouting at me, “I’m pregnant alright?”
I stop and take a step back. My sister has always been more than careful. She assured me after the shock of her coming home and saying, “Jules, I had sex” that this would never happen. She’s always been so strong and at this moment she looks so venerable and weak.
“What are you gonna do?” I ask quietly.
“I need you Jules. We have to get rid of it.” She’s staring at me with such a penetrating gaze that I’m scared of what she would do if I said no.
“Why me?”
“You’ve always been here for me. You’re my sister.”
And with her simple answer, I’m in.
"I'll call a clinic for you. It'll be gone by the end of the week and we can forget it ever happened."
"I know I can always count on you Jules."
I realize just how much I love my sister. I love her enough to kill an innocent unborn child to keep her safe. Either that or I'm an idiot.
"Why me? Why now?" She yelled.
"You're the one beating the crap out of yourself!"
"This shouldn't have happened. I don't understand!"
"What don't you understand?"
"Get off of me damn it! I need to do this!"
“Do what? I don’t understand what you’re trying to say Kim!”
“Just leave me alone Julia! I don’t need anyone!”
I punch her face and she stops the frantic fight. Her lip is bleeding but she doesn’t look like she cares.
“Tell me what the hell is going on.” I demand after a few seconds of silence.
“Nothing.”
“Liar.”
“Fine.”
I wait for her to go on but she doesn’t. “Well?”
“I’m not sure…I don’t know…it’s weird but I guess…” She keeps trailing off the end of sentences.
“What? Tell me. Trust me. Come on. You used to tell me everything. You can still talk to me. Talk. Kim. Talk.”
I can see that I’m pressuring her and she finally snaps shouting at me, “I’m pregnant alright?”
I stop and take a step back. My sister has always been more than careful. She assured me after the shock of her coming home and saying, “Jules, I had sex” that this would never happen. She’s always been so strong and at this moment she looks so venerable and weak.
“What are you gonna do?” I ask quietly.
“I need you Jules. We have to get rid of it.” She’s staring at me with such a penetrating gaze that I’m scared of what she would do if I said no.
“Why me?”
“You’ve always been here for me. You’re my sister.”
And with her simple answer, I’m in.
"I'll call a clinic for you. It'll be gone by the end of the week and we can forget it ever happened."
"I know I can always count on you Jules."
I realize just how much I love my sister. I love her enough to kill an innocent unborn child to keep her safe. Either that or I'm an idiot.
Tuesday, June 29, 2010
Forgetting - Part 4
It's been three whole days and Kim still hasn't talked to me. She gets up later than I do, and she takes her breakfast into dad's study. She stays home curled up on the couch in the basement watching sappy chick-flicks. I feel worse than I ever have. It's like we aren't related anymore. I don't know what I did really. I only want to know why she's acting this way.
The phone rings. My parents aren't home and I'm not going to relay on Kim while she's mad at me, so I answer it.
"Hello?"
"Hey little sis!"
"Eric!"
"Which one of you am I talking to, and don't lie."
"It's Julia. Kim is...not herself today."
"Ah, I see. It's one of those things, is it?"
"No! She's a little sick." As I said that I hear footsteps in the hall, Kim's for sure, and the bathroom door closing. "How was the first year at Yale?" Eric is a journalism major.
"It was nice. I got a good spot on the paper." I can hear Kim hacking up in the bathroom. Maybe I was right, she is sick? "I'm in Paris today."
I forget about Kim and gasp, "Really? What's it like?"
"I can see the Eiffel tower from my hotel room. The cheese really is as pungent as rumored, however the people are not as rude."
"What'd you get me?"
"That is something you don't get to know until I get back. I go to Spain, Ireland, and Great Brittan before I get back to the U.S."
"Fine."
"Hey, I gotta go. I don't want to waste the minutes on my phone card. Tell Kim to get better for me. I love you, both of you."
"I'll tell her. I love you too."
"Goodbye."
"Bye."
I hang up and notice that Kim is still in the bathroom. I softly knock on the door when I hear her crying.
"Kimmie? Look, I know you're mad at me but you have to let me talk to you." I wait but she doesn't answer. "Please?"
She doesn't answer but I open the door anyway. Kim is lying on the floor, she threw up. I can tell because she didn't get it all in the toilet. I help her up and let her lean on me while we go upstairs. I leave her in her bed and go to clean up her barf. For some reason, I feel better that she's just sick. I guess that's why she flipped at me. Soon she'll be better and things will be back to the way they used to be.
This is what is going through my mind as I go back into our room. I stop dead in the doorway as I see Kim sitting on the floor and beating herself in the stomach. Her eyes are crazy and tears are running down her face. Under her breath she's saying "No" over and over again. What's going on? I'm scared of her.
The phone rings. My parents aren't home and I'm not going to relay on Kim while she's mad at me, so I answer it.
"Hello?"
"Hey little sis!"
"Eric!"
"Which one of you am I talking to, and don't lie."
"It's Julia. Kim is...not herself today."
"Ah, I see. It's one of those things, is it?"
"No! She's a little sick." As I said that I hear footsteps in the hall, Kim's for sure, and the bathroom door closing. "How was the first year at Yale?" Eric is a journalism major.
"It was nice. I got a good spot on the paper." I can hear Kim hacking up in the bathroom. Maybe I was right, she is sick? "I'm in Paris today."
I forget about Kim and gasp, "Really? What's it like?"
"I can see the Eiffel tower from my hotel room. The cheese really is as pungent as rumored, however the people are not as rude."
"What'd you get me?"
"That is something you don't get to know until I get back. I go to Spain, Ireland, and Great Brittan before I get back to the U.S."
"Fine."
"Hey, I gotta go. I don't want to waste the minutes on my phone card. Tell Kim to get better for me. I love you, both of you."
"I'll tell her. I love you too."
"Goodbye."
"Bye."
I hang up and notice that Kim is still in the bathroom. I softly knock on the door when I hear her crying.
"Kimmie? Look, I know you're mad at me but you have to let me talk to you." I wait but she doesn't answer. "Please?"
She doesn't answer but I open the door anyway. Kim is lying on the floor, she threw up. I can tell because she didn't get it all in the toilet. I help her up and let her lean on me while we go upstairs. I leave her in her bed and go to clean up her barf. For some reason, I feel better that she's just sick. I guess that's why she flipped at me. Soon she'll be better and things will be back to the way they used to be.
This is what is going through my mind as I go back into our room. I stop dead in the doorway as I see Kim sitting on the floor and beating herself in the stomach. Her eyes are crazy and tears are running down her face. Under her breath she's saying "No" over and over again. What's going on? I'm scared of her.
Monday, June 28, 2010
Forgetting - Part 3
It's nine in the morning and Kim still isn't up. This wouldn't be strange if she hadn't gone to bed at 11 last night and never left the house. She hasn't gone out since the party at Jesse's a week ago.
I'm curled up on the couch with a book about the Grand Dutches Anastasia Nikolaevna of Russia. She fascinates me, always has. I am reading about the family's assassination and Anastasia's possible escape when Kim stumbles downstairs.
"Morning sunshine."
She grunts at me and makes a b-line for the coffee.
I wait for her to take a few long sips before asking, "Are you going out today?"
"Yeah. I'm going shopping for school stuff, you're coming right?"
"Of course."
Kim is going to study psychology at Brown University in the fall. I will be at Harvard for Classics and Classical Studies of literature. It'll be the first time we've been really apart since we were born.
We end up going to get sheets and towels. We're in an office supplies store looking for suitable notebooks when I lose my sister.
"Hey Kim what do you think of this?" I turn around with a thick black journal in my hand, but nobody is there to show it to. "Kim?" No answer. "Kimmie?" Still no answer. I now have to search the store for my flighty twin. Great. Luckily, she is my twin and I know exactly where she'll be.
I go straight to the section with the markers and poster board and paints. There she is, holding a container of glitter glue.
"What do you think my roommate would say if I painted all the walls of our dorm with glitter glue?" She asks, not looking at me.
"She would send the psychology major to a therapist." This makes Kim laugh. "Come on Kimmie, what's wrong?"
She still is silently refusing to look at me. "Nothing is wrong. Why would you think that?"
"Maybe because I know you. We've been gone all day and you haven't even called Jesse once. You haven't gone out anywhere in a week. Plus," I plucked the bottle from her hand, "You're talking to craft glue."
"I'm fine. Why do you always assume the worst if I just want to take it easy for a couple of days? What's wrong with me going shopping with my sister and not calling my boyfriend? Nothing is going on, okay? You can be so stupid sometimes! I'm not even talking to the glue, I was talking to you. Just because I'm looking at something doesn't mean we're having a conversation. Go read a book, it's where you belong anyway!"
She storms past me and leaves me dumbfounded in the middle of the isle. It takes me a minute to run after her, momentarily forgetting that she has the car keys.
When I catch up to her she's already starting the engine. Crap. I jump onto the passenger side of the car and hang on. I know she can't get far with me like that and the doors are locked. She's about to pull out of the parking lot when the lock clicks. I get in the car and we ride home in silence. There's nothing I can say, nothing I can do. She has never exploded on my like that. I feel like I've lost my sister entirely in one afternoon.
I'm curled up on the couch with a book about the Grand Dutches Anastasia Nikolaevna of Russia. She fascinates me, always has. I am reading about the family's assassination and Anastasia's possible escape when Kim stumbles downstairs.
"Morning sunshine."
She grunts at me and makes a b-line for the coffee.
I wait for her to take a few long sips before asking, "Are you going out today?"
"Yeah. I'm going shopping for school stuff, you're coming right?"
"Of course."
Kim is going to study psychology at Brown University in the fall. I will be at Harvard for Classics and Classical Studies of literature. It'll be the first time we've been really apart since we were born.
We end up going to get sheets and towels. We're in an office supplies store looking for suitable notebooks when I lose my sister.
"Hey Kim what do you think of this?" I turn around with a thick black journal in my hand, but nobody is there to show it to. "Kim?" No answer. "Kimmie?" Still no answer. I now have to search the store for my flighty twin. Great. Luckily, she is my twin and I know exactly where she'll be.
I go straight to the section with the markers and poster board and paints. There she is, holding a container of glitter glue.
"What do you think my roommate would say if I painted all the walls of our dorm with glitter glue?" She asks, not looking at me.
"She would send the psychology major to a therapist." This makes Kim laugh. "Come on Kimmie, what's wrong?"
She still is silently refusing to look at me. "Nothing is wrong. Why would you think that?"
"Maybe because I know you. We've been gone all day and you haven't even called Jesse once. You haven't gone out anywhere in a week. Plus," I plucked the bottle from her hand, "You're talking to craft glue."
"I'm fine. Why do you always assume the worst if I just want to take it easy for a couple of days? What's wrong with me going shopping with my sister and not calling my boyfriend? Nothing is going on, okay? You can be so stupid sometimes! I'm not even talking to the glue, I was talking to you. Just because I'm looking at something doesn't mean we're having a conversation. Go read a book, it's where you belong anyway!"
She storms past me and leaves me dumbfounded in the middle of the isle. It takes me a minute to run after her, momentarily forgetting that she has the car keys.
When I catch up to her she's already starting the engine. Crap. I jump onto the passenger side of the car and hang on. I know she can't get far with me like that and the doors are locked. She's about to pull out of the parking lot when the lock clicks. I get in the car and we ride home in silence. There's nothing I can say, nothing I can do. She has never exploded on my like that. I feel like I've lost my sister entirely in one afternoon.
Saturday, June 26, 2010
Forgetting - Part 2
Two Years Earlier
It is 4 o'clock in the morning. I feel someone breathing on my face and I instantly know that Kim is home. I don't want to open my eyes. If I do then Kim will make me talk to her for hours. Summer was supposed to mean sleeping in.
Even though I don't open my eyes, Kim still knows that I'm awake.
"Jules, hey, I've gotta talk to you!" She whispers. I can feel her freaking lips on my nose. She has apparently never heard of personal space. When I don't answer she gets onto my bed and sits on my chest. She's thin and tall, but she is not exactly "light".
"Get the fuck off of me." I grumble. "I can't breath."
She gets up and I don't move. She is standing next to my bed and staring at me, I know it.
"Jules?" She waits. "Julia?"
Silence
"Are you asleep?"
No, I'm just lying in bed not answering at four in the freaking morning because it's fun. "What the hell do you think?"
"Well you're talking."
Grunt.
"Come on, I have to talk to you!"
I sit up and open my eyes. She is standing next to me and staring expectantly. "Why do you feel a need to share every second of your life with me?"
"Because you're my sister. Would you rather I didn't tell you anything ever?"
"Can't this wait till the morning?"
"It is the morning. I win."
She flicks the desk lamp on and sits on her own bed for a change. Tonight she has on a red dress and black pumps. Her hair is up in a twisted bun and she is in the process of taking off fake glitter eyelashes.
"You look like a whore." I tell her as she takes off her shoes.
"You look like me." She sticks her tongue out at me.
I can't even argue with that. Being an identical twin sucks sometimes. The only way to tell us apart is that I wear glasses and she has contacts.
"So where were you anyway?" I ask. Now I'm awake and curious as to where on earth she would go looking like this.
"A party at Jesse's. His parents are out of town this week."
"Oh really? Did you drink?"
"Nope! No boos allowed girlie. His parents don't even drink. I didn't smoke or do drugs either. It was a clean party so there."
"Then why do you look like that?"
"All my other party clothes are in our laundry. Unzip me."
I get up to get her zipper. "Did you tell Jesse that too?"
She turns to me and glowers. "Why must you always think the worst of me?"
"You didn't answer my question."
She turns as red as her dress and turns around. "Shut up. We didn't do anything tonight."
"Okay."
We are both quiet for a minute. Kim is truly a good girl. She doesn't do anything bad really. She's even responsible when she does...other things. We may be twins, but we are almost exact opposites.
She's what anyone would call "fun". She goes to parties or concerts almost every night and has had the same boyfriend for two years. Despite this, boys are still fighting for her attention all the time. Her grades could be better, but she's never actually flunked anything. I like to stay home and read. I have to drive to libraries out of town to get books now because I've read everything interesting in our town. I go on dates now and then, but I've never had a serious boyfriend. I've gotten straight A's since elementary school. I would give anything to be my sister for just one day.
"Scrabble?" I ask.
"What?"
"Well I'm awake now."
She smiles and nods. I pull out the game and we play until we both fall asleep on our bedroom floor.
It is 4 o'clock in the morning. I feel someone breathing on my face and I instantly know that Kim is home. I don't want to open my eyes. If I do then Kim will make me talk to her for hours. Summer was supposed to mean sleeping in.
Even though I don't open my eyes, Kim still knows that I'm awake.
"Jules, hey, I've gotta talk to you!" She whispers. I can feel her freaking lips on my nose. She has apparently never heard of personal space. When I don't answer she gets onto my bed and sits on my chest. She's thin and tall, but she is not exactly "light".
"Get the fuck off of me." I grumble. "I can't breath."
She gets up and I don't move. She is standing next to my bed and staring at me, I know it.
"Jules?" She waits. "Julia?"
Silence
"Are you asleep?"
No, I'm just lying in bed not answering at four in the freaking morning because it's fun. "What the hell do you think?"
"Well you're talking."
Grunt.
"Come on, I have to talk to you!"
I sit up and open my eyes. She is standing next to me and staring expectantly. "Why do you feel a need to share every second of your life with me?"
"Because you're my sister. Would you rather I didn't tell you anything ever?"
"Can't this wait till the morning?"
"It is the morning. I win."
She flicks the desk lamp on and sits on her own bed for a change. Tonight she has on a red dress and black pumps. Her hair is up in a twisted bun and she is in the process of taking off fake glitter eyelashes.
"You look like a whore." I tell her as she takes off her shoes.
"You look like me." She sticks her tongue out at me.
I can't even argue with that. Being an identical twin sucks sometimes. The only way to tell us apart is that I wear glasses and she has contacts.
"So where were you anyway?" I ask. Now I'm awake and curious as to where on earth she would go looking like this.
"A party at Jesse's. His parents are out of town this week."
"Oh really? Did you drink?"
"Nope! No boos allowed girlie. His parents don't even drink. I didn't smoke or do drugs either. It was a clean party so there."
"Then why do you look like that?"
"All my other party clothes are in our laundry. Unzip me."
I get up to get her zipper. "Did you tell Jesse that too?"
She turns to me and glowers. "Why must you always think the worst of me?"
"You didn't answer my question."
She turns as red as her dress and turns around. "Shut up. We didn't do anything tonight."
"Okay."
We are both quiet for a minute. Kim is truly a good girl. She doesn't do anything bad really. She's even responsible when she does...other things. We may be twins, but we are almost exact opposites.
She's what anyone would call "fun". She goes to parties or concerts almost every night and has had the same boyfriend for two years. Despite this, boys are still fighting for her attention all the time. Her grades could be better, but she's never actually flunked anything. I like to stay home and read. I have to drive to libraries out of town to get books now because I've read everything interesting in our town. I go on dates now and then, but I've never had a serious boyfriend. I've gotten straight A's since elementary school. I would give anything to be my sister for just one day.
"Scrabble?" I ask.
"What?"
"Well I'm awake now."
She smiles and nods. I pull out the game and we play until we both fall asleep on our bedroom floor.
Forgetting - Part 1
I'm not sure what I'm supposed to remember. My childhood? That's long gone. What do you want from me? My life story? That's not even possible anymore. I can only remember little things, unimportant things. I can remember wearing a red hat on the day of my brother's graduation, but nothing else. I can vividly see the shoes I wore to prom but can't remember who I went with. I can remember every word of a note I got from my best friend the day I got to college, but where I went and for what is a dizzy blur. I know I should know these things, but I just don't. What's wrong with me?
Tuesday, June 22, 2010
Do Right - Scenes 7 & 8
Scene VII
The song Remember When it Rained by Josh Groban is playing.
The train rushes away and we see Peter inside looking out a window at the falling snow. He holds the scarf up to his face.
Joey and Allie walk out into the falling snow. Joey has an arm around Allie’s shoulder. He bends and kisses her cheek.
A tent pitched in the snow, Peter sitting outside. He’s got the scarf on. He’s looking at a picture of himself, Allie, and Joey.
Allie is sitting alone in front of a menorah. All 8 candles are lit.
Joey is sitting alone around a Christmas tree with no presents opened.
Battle footage.
Allie and Joey are sitting in a living room around a radio. Allie jumps up to get the door. It’s a telegram that clearly reads, “I won’t be home this year. Sorry ladybug.” She falls onto Joey and cries.
Battle footage.
Allie opens a door and hesitantly takes a telegram. As she reads she puts a hand over her mouth and tears start to roll. She shakes her head, drops the slip of paper. The telegram boy mouths, “I’m sorry” but she slams the door and runs through the house. Joey gets up from the couch and follows her. She screams. She smashes a vase and knocks over pictures. She punches her bed and sinks to her knees next to it. She sobs uncontrollably into the sheets. Joey comes up behind her and pats her back. He is crying too. Fade to black.
Scene VIII
It’s fall, leaves are on the ground. Allie and Joey are standing in front of a grave. Flags are stuck in the ground on either side of the stone and bundles of flowers are laid on the dirt. Allie and Joey are holding a folded up flag together. There is silence except the birds and rustle of nature. The stone reads, “Peter Lloyd Caldwell, solider.”
Allie – He came home, and he won’t ever leave again.
Joey – Just like he promised.
The song Remember When it Rained by Josh Groban is playing.
The train rushes away and we see Peter inside looking out a window at the falling snow. He holds the scarf up to his face.
Joey and Allie walk out into the falling snow. Joey has an arm around Allie’s shoulder. He bends and kisses her cheek.
A tent pitched in the snow, Peter sitting outside. He’s got the scarf on. He’s looking at a picture of himself, Allie, and Joey.
Allie is sitting alone in front of a menorah. All 8 candles are lit.
Joey is sitting alone around a Christmas tree with no presents opened.
Battle footage.
Allie and Joey are sitting in a living room around a radio. Allie jumps up to get the door. It’s a telegram that clearly reads, “I won’t be home this year. Sorry ladybug.” She falls onto Joey and cries.
Battle footage.
Allie opens a door and hesitantly takes a telegram. As she reads she puts a hand over her mouth and tears start to roll. She shakes her head, drops the slip of paper. The telegram boy mouths, “I’m sorry” but she slams the door and runs through the house. Joey gets up from the couch and follows her. She screams. She smashes a vase and knocks over pictures. She punches her bed and sinks to her knees next to it. She sobs uncontrollably into the sheets. Joey comes up behind her and pats her back. He is crying too. Fade to black.
Scene VIII
It’s fall, leaves are on the ground. Allie and Joey are standing in front of a grave. Flags are stuck in the ground on either side of the stone and bundles of flowers are laid on the dirt. Allie and Joey are holding a folded up flag together. There is silence except the birds and rustle of nature. The stone reads, “Peter Lloyd Caldwell, solider.”
Allie – He came home, and he won’t ever leave again.
Joey – Just like he promised.
Saturday, June 19, 2010
Do Right - Scenes 5 & 6
Scene V
Allie and Joey are sitting at a booth in a diner. Music is playing in the background. They’re both drinking cherry coke. They sit in silence for a while before anything is said.
Joey – They didn’t want me. I’m stuck here.
Allie – Why’s that Joey? They think you’ll blow up all of Europe?
Joey – Nah, well… I’m apparently unstable cause of the ADHD. Can’t have distracted peoples in wars ya know. No knowing what you think would be fun to shoot at. They think I’d get my own foot within hours. That ain’t ADHD, that’s just stupid.
Allie – Yeah. (She stirs her coke with the straw)
Joey - But now you get to keep me right here with you babe.
Allie – Uh-huh.
Joey – Hey, what’s on your mind sugar cube?
Allie – Nothin’.
Joey – Yeah right. I’ve known you since you were three feet tall little girl, I know something’s eatin’ your brain. (He moves next to her in the booth and puts an arm around her.) Talk to me Allie.
Allie – (Starting to cry) They’re taking him away Joey! It’s too darn close to Christmas. He’s shipping out tomorrow! (Allie sobs into Joey’s shoulder and her holds her tight)
Joey – It’ll be okay honey. He’s gonna come home soon, he said so himself. (Beat) He promised.
Scene VI
Allie, Peter, and Joey are standing on the platform of a train station. Allie is still wearing the scarf. Joey and Peter embrace.
Joey – I’m gonna miss you.
Peter – Same here.
Allie practically jumps on Peter. He swings her around in the air.
Allie – Please stay Peaty. I got a bad feeling about you leavin’.
Peter – I gotta go ladybug. It’s not up to me.
Peter puts Allie back on her feet. She’s crying again. He kisses her forehead.
Conductor – All aboard!
Allie grabs Peter’s sleeve. Her eyes are big and she shakes her head. Joey puts a hand on Allie’s shoulder. She takes her scarf off and gives it to Peter. The trains whistle blows. Peter turns and runs toward the door. He stops before getting on and yells back…
Peter – I love you! Both of you!
The train speeds away and the montage begins…
Allie and Joey are sitting at a booth in a diner. Music is playing in the background. They’re both drinking cherry coke. They sit in silence for a while before anything is said.
Joey – They didn’t want me. I’m stuck here.
Allie – Why’s that Joey? They think you’ll blow up all of Europe?
Joey – Nah, well… I’m apparently unstable cause of the ADHD. Can’t have distracted peoples in wars ya know. No knowing what you think would be fun to shoot at. They think I’d get my own foot within hours. That ain’t ADHD, that’s just stupid.
Allie – Yeah. (She stirs her coke with the straw)
Joey - But now you get to keep me right here with you babe.
Allie – Uh-huh.
Joey – Hey, what’s on your mind sugar cube?
Allie – Nothin’.
Joey – Yeah right. I’ve known you since you were three feet tall little girl, I know something’s eatin’ your brain. (He moves next to her in the booth and puts an arm around her.) Talk to me Allie.
Allie – (Starting to cry) They’re taking him away Joey! It’s too darn close to Christmas. He’s shipping out tomorrow! (Allie sobs into Joey’s shoulder and her holds her tight)
Joey – It’ll be okay honey. He’s gonna come home soon, he said so himself. (Beat) He promised.
Scene VI
Allie, Peter, and Joey are standing on the platform of a train station. Allie is still wearing the scarf. Joey and Peter embrace.
Joey – I’m gonna miss you.
Peter – Same here.
Allie practically jumps on Peter. He swings her around in the air.
Allie – Please stay Peaty. I got a bad feeling about you leavin’.
Peter – I gotta go ladybug. It’s not up to me.
Peter puts Allie back on her feet. She’s crying again. He kisses her forehead.
Conductor – All aboard!
Allie grabs Peter’s sleeve. Her eyes are big and she shakes her head. Joey puts a hand on Allie’s shoulder. She takes her scarf off and gives it to Peter. The trains whistle blows. Peter turns and runs toward the door. He stops before getting on and yells back…
Peter – I love you! Both of you!
The train speeds away and the montage begins…
Do Right - Scenes 3 & 4
Scene III
Allie, Peter, and Joey are walking through the door of a swing club. The music is loud and the dance floor is full of people, but not overflowing. All three are smiling wide as the hang up their coats quickly and accept drinks from a waiter. Allie puts her drink down on an empty table after a long sip and pulls Peter and Joey with her.
Allie – Come on!
The three dance with the music, smiling and laughing. They are clearly having the time of their lives. Suddenly the music stops.
Person 1 – Shut it! Quiet!
General – As you all must know, the United States of America has entered the war. It’s your job to assist your country in any way possible. What we need are men, men who can fight for what’s right. That means over 18, healthy, and brave. This is a draft people, and the time has come to serve.
The general leaves after tacking up a poster of “Uncle Sam” and there is silence. Allie is holding one of Peter’s hands and one of Joey’s. She squeezes their hands.
Scene IV
Allie and Peter are walking through a park. The sun is shining. It is clear that Allie has been crying. Allie is still wearing the scarf.
Allie – There’s no way to get out of the draft, is there?
Peter – No. I’m so sorry ladybug, I gotta go. Trust me, I don’t wanna, but I gotta.
Allie – I just can’t imagine you hurting anything. You ain’t a solider Peaty.
Peter – I know I ain’t, but that won’t change nothing.
Allie – (whimpering) You can’t leave me Peaty. I need you here, I always will. (She starts crying again. He pulls her into a hug)
Peter – When I get home, I promise that I’ll never leave again. I’ll stay right here, by your side.
Allie, Peter, and Joey are walking through the door of a swing club. The music is loud and the dance floor is full of people, but not overflowing. All three are smiling wide as the hang up their coats quickly and accept drinks from a waiter. Allie puts her drink down on an empty table after a long sip and pulls Peter and Joey with her.
Allie – Come on!
The three dance with the music, smiling and laughing. They are clearly having the time of their lives. Suddenly the music stops.
Person 1 – Shut it! Quiet!
General – As you all must know, the United States of America has entered the war. It’s your job to assist your country in any way possible. What we need are men, men who can fight for what’s right. That means over 18, healthy, and brave. This is a draft people, and the time has come to serve.
The general leaves after tacking up a poster of “Uncle Sam” and there is silence. Allie is holding one of Peter’s hands and one of Joey’s. She squeezes their hands.
Scene IV
Allie and Peter are walking through a park. The sun is shining. It is clear that Allie has been crying. Allie is still wearing the scarf.
Allie – There’s no way to get out of the draft, is there?
Peter – No. I’m so sorry ladybug, I gotta go. Trust me, I don’t wanna, but I gotta.
Allie – I just can’t imagine you hurting anything. You ain’t a solider Peaty.
Peter – I know I ain’t, but that won’t change nothing.
Allie – (whimpering) You can’t leave me Peaty. I need you here, I always will. (She starts crying again. He pulls her into a hug)
Peter – When I get home, I promise that I’ll never leave again. I’ll stay right here, by your side.
Thursday, June 17, 2010
Do Right - Scenes 1 & 2
Main Characters
Allie – A girl, 17-18 years old. She’s dainty and polite, delicate.
Peter – Tall and kind, 18-19 years old. He’s always happy, always nice
Joey – Easily excitable, 18-19 years old. Has ADHD, preventing him from being enlisted.
Scene I
Allie, Peter, and Joey are sitting around an old fashioned radio. Sunlight is coming through the window. FDR’s voice is coming out of the radio, giving the Infamy speech. The three sit and react to what they’re hearing. Fade to black.
Scene II
Allie and Peter are standing outside and banging on a door. It’s cold out and there’s a bit of snow. A few multi-colored leaves litter the ground also. It’s early December. The sky is a deep blue, it’s probably between 11 and 12pm. Allie has a scarf on. This scarf is important.
Allie – (yelling) Come on Joey! I gotta be home before mamma wakes up!
Peter – (also yelling) We’ll leave without ya kid! I swear we will!
Allie – (giggling, quieter now) We can’t leave without him Peter. He’s the one with a car!
Peter – (pretending to think hard about this) I suppose you’re right ladybug. Guess we’ll just have to wait out here in the cold. (He sits on the steps. She sits next to him and he puts an arm around her shoulder)
Allie – You know I love you, right? (She stares up at him with wide eyes)
Peter – You know I think I have heard that somewhere. It’s a good thing, cause I love you too. (He squeezes her shoulder. The door opens and Joey steps outside. He rubs his hands together)
Joey – Jesus it’s cold out here! Get in the car and let’s go!
Allie – A girl, 17-18 years old. She’s dainty and polite, delicate.
Peter – Tall and kind, 18-19 years old. He’s always happy, always nice
Joey – Easily excitable, 18-19 years old. Has ADHD, preventing him from being enlisted.
Scene I
Allie, Peter, and Joey are sitting around an old fashioned radio. Sunlight is coming through the window. FDR’s voice is coming out of the radio, giving the Infamy speech. The three sit and react to what they’re hearing. Fade to black.
Scene II
Allie and Peter are standing outside and banging on a door. It’s cold out and there’s a bit of snow. A few multi-colored leaves litter the ground also. It’s early December. The sky is a deep blue, it’s probably between 11 and 12pm. Allie has a scarf on. This scarf is important.
Allie – (yelling) Come on Joey! I gotta be home before mamma wakes up!
Peter – (also yelling) We’ll leave without ya kid! I swear we will!
Allie – (giggling, quieter now) We can’t leave without him Peter. He’s the one with a car!
Peter – (pretending to think hard about this) I suppose you’re right ladybug. Guess we’ll just have to wait out here in the cold. (He sits on the steps. She sits next to him and he puts an arm around her shoulder)
Allie – You know I love you, right? (She stares up at him with wide eyes)
Peter – You know I think I have heard that somewhere. It’s a good thing, cause I love you too. (He squeezes her shoulder. The door opens and Joey steps outside. He rubs his hands together)
Joey – Jesus it’s cold out here! Get in the car and let’s go!
Thursday, May 27, 2010
Fine: Part 4
"Are you family?" A woman stopped him from following her into the emergency room.
"I'm her brother." He pushed past her.
It was scary, seeing them stick her like a pin cushion. They moved her to the intensive care unit after they figured out that it was an extreme case of dehydration. He couldn't help thinking things like, "If I had done this..." or "It's my fault because...".
He stayed diligently by her side, holding her lifeless hand. She woke up briefly. She jerked awake and looked as if she was going to try to rip the needles from her arm. She did pull the oxygen mask off.
"Where am I?" She asked, confused.
"You're in the hospital sweetie. You fainted in gym class." He was so happy to see her awake he began to cry. "You're just dehydrated. You are going to be fine."
"You're right, I will be. I'll be better than fine. Please remember that, and remember my eyes."
This baffled him. "Why are you talking like this?" He asked. He sgueezed her hand. "I'm right here and I'm not gonna leave you."
"I know." She said and smiled. Her eyes closed and her hand went limp in his.
"I'm her brother." He pushed past her.
It was scary, seeing them stick her like a pin cushion. They moved her to the intensive care unit after they figured out that it was an extreme case of dehydration. He couldn't help thinking things like, "If I had done this..." or "It's my fault because...".
He stayed diligently by her side, holding her lifeless hand. She woke up briefly. She jerked awake and looked as if she was going to try to rip the needles from her arm. She did pull the oxygen mask off.
"Where am I?" She asked, confused.
"You're in the hospital sweetie. You fainted in gym class." He was so happy to see her awake he began to cry. "You're just dehydrated. You are going to be fine."
"You're right, I will be. I'll be better than fine. Please remember that, and remember my eyes."
This baffled him. "Why are you talking like this?" He asked. He sgueezed her hand. "I'm right here and I'm not gonna leave you."
"I know." She said and smiled. Her eyes closed and her hand went limp in his.
Wednesday, May 26, 2010
Fine: Part 3
Someone fainted in the gym. Who was in the gym right now? Shit. No, no, no, no, no! He opened the door and ran down the hall.
“Hey!” someone yelled after him. He kept running. The same thing was racing through his brain over and over, the name and the image of her crumpled body. He heard her voice calling to him; I need you, again and again.
He burst through the door and up to the weight room. Nobody was there; they were all on the track. He heard them and ran to the spot they had gathered. She was lying there in the midst of everyone. They might have been talking to him but he didn’t hear any of them.
He bent over and picked up her lifeless body. It was like she was dead. He didn’t notice he was crying until he saw a tear hit her forehead. Sam cradled her to his chest and ran with her back to the main building.
The nurse knew he they were coming. A bed was ready for her and they had already called her parents. He laid her down on the bed and sat with her head on his lap. He stroked her hair and whispered that it was going to be okay. He was still crying.
“The ambulance is here.” The nurse told him.
“I’m going with her.” He said firmly. “I said I would always be here for her. She needs me and I can’t break my promise.” He choked out through the thick tears. The nurse didn’t have the heart to argue.
The EMT came in to get her and he lifted her to his chest once again. “I’ve got her.” He barked.
“Just let him.” The nurse said softly.
He put her on the stretcher and held her hand as they wheeled her into the ambulance. He climbed in next to her and went back to stroking her hair out of her face. He sang under his breath a lullaby she loved. They put an oxygen mask on her. He cried harder when they stuck needles in her arm. He wiped away the tear that ran down her face. He squeezed her hand and sang a little louder. The notes were broken with sobs.
“Hey!” someone yelled after him. He kept running. The same thing was racing through his brain over and over, the name and the image of her crumpled body. He heard her voice calling to him; I need you, again and again.
He burst through the door and up to the weight room. Nobody was there; they were all on the track. He heard them and ran to the spot they had gathered. She was lying there in the midst of everyone. They might have been talking to him but he didn’t hear any of them.
He bent over and picked up her lifeless body. It was like she was dead. He didn’t notice he was crying until he saw a tear hit her forehead. Sam cradled her to his chest and ran with her back to the main building.
The nurse knew he they were coming. A bed was ready for her and they had already called her parents. He laid her down on the bed and sat with her head on his lap. He stroked her hair and whispered that it was going to be okay. He was still crying.
“The ambulance is here.” The nurse told him.
“I’m going with her.” He said firmly. “I said I would always be here for her. She needs me and I can’t break my promise.” He choked out through the thick tears. The nurse didn’t have the heart to argue.
The EMT came in to get her and he lifted her to his chest once again. “I’ve got her.” He barked.
“Just let him.” The nurse said softly.
He put her on the stretcher and held her hand as they wheeled her into the ambulance. He climbed in next to her and went back to stroking her hair out of her face. He sang under his breath a lullaby she loved. They put an oxygen mask on her. He cried harder when they stuck needles in her arm. He wiped away the tear that ran down her face. He squeezed her hand and sang a little louder. The notes were broken with sobs.
Sunday, May 23, 2010
Fine: Part 2
Natalie, one of her friends from class, had seen her fall. She was the one who had called out her name. Natalie heard her yell out Sam’s name and ran to her side as she went down. Natalie checked her pulse, racing to the extreme.
“Help!” Natalie yelled out. “Help, please! Someone!” she was terrified.
The teacher came running. “What’s going on here?” she asked.
“She just passed out, I don’t know what happened.” Natalie said shakily.
The teacher bent down to check her pulse, still too fast. “She needs to get to the nurse now.” This was the tricky part. How was she supposed to get to the nurse?
Natalie saw the puzzlement on the teachers face and said, “She yelled out a name before she went down. I think you should call him down."
In the main building a classroom phone rang. The teacher picked up the phone and said, “Yes, yes right away. Yes he’s leaving now. Yes, I’ll tell him.”
The teacher turned to him. “Someone fainted in the gym.”
“Help!” Natalie yelled out. “Help, please! Someone!” she was terrified.
The teacher came running. “What’s going on here?” she asked.
“She just passed out, I don’t know what happened.” Natalie said shakily.
The teacher bent down to check her pulse, still too fast. “She needs to get to the nurse now.” This was the tricky part. How was she supposed to get to the nurse?
Natalie saw the puzzlement on the teachers face and said, “She yelled out a name before she went down. I think you should call him down."
In the main building a classroom phone rang. The teacher picked up the phone and said, “Yes, yes right away. Yes he’s leaving now. Yes, I’ll tell him.”
The teacher turned to him. “Someone fainted in the gym.”
Fine: Part 1
This was a dream I had. I woke up at midnight and wrote it down imediatly. This is what goes down in my subconcious...
“I’ll be fine.” She protested as she crossed her arms. “I don’t want anything, it’s okay.”
“I don’t believe you.” He answered and crossed his arms as well. “Please take it and get something. It would make me feel better.” He waved a hand of ones in front of her face. She shooed his hand away.
“I’ll be fine.” She repeated. “I’m not even hungry.” She prayed that her stomach wouldn’t growl as she said it. She had skipped breakfast too, but she hated borrowing money.
The bell rang and she stood up and flung her bag over her shoulder. He gave her a concerning look but knew she was too stubborn to listen, even if he knew what he was talking about.
They walked down the hall in silence, side by side like always. Their paths split at the door and they shared a quick goodbye. She hugged him and exited to go to the gym. Her stomach growled and she hit herself in the abdomen. “Shut up.” She hissed.
She changed quickly in the locker room and then went up to the weight room for class. She didn’t bother to stretch, but instead went straight to the machines. She pedaled on the bike for a while and her pulse was at the height of its endurance. She lifted weights and then decided to run the track for the last half hour. She got around a few times, but didn’t want to stop. She pushed herself farther, her throat was burning and she was sweating like crazy. Her ability to run in a straight line was lost and everything started spinning. She was only halfway through the lap, and was determined to finish. She went a little faster, her pulse beating like crazy. She heard someone call out her name and heard herself scream before she blacked out.
“I’ll be fine.” She protested as she crossed her arms. “I don’t want anything, it’s okay.”
“I don’t believe you.” He answered and crossed his arms as well. “Please take it and get something. It would make me feel better.” He waved a hand of ones in front of her face. She shooed his hand away.
“I’ll be fine.” She repeated. “I’m not even hungry.” She prayed that her stomach wouldn’t growl as she said it. She had skipped breakfast too, but she hated borrowing money.
The bell rang and she stood up and flung her bag over her shoulder. He gave her a concerning look but knew she was too stubborn to listen, even if he knew what he was talking about.
They walked down the hall in silence, side by side like always. Their paths split at the door and they shared a quick goodbye. She hugged him and exited to go to the gym. Her stomach growled and she hit herself in the abdomen. “Shut up.” She hissed.
She changed quickly in the locker room and then went up to the weight room for class. She didn’t bother to stretch, but instead went straight to the machines. She pedaled on the bike for a while and her pulse was at the height of its endurance. She lifted weights and then decided to run the track for the last half hour. She got around a few times, but didn’t want to stop. She pushed herself farther, her throat was burning and she was sweating like crazy. Her ability to run in a straight line was lost and everything started spinning. She was only halfway through the lap, and was determined to finish. She went a little faster, her pulse beating like crazy. She heard someone call out her name and heard herself scream before she blacked out.
Sunday, April 11, 2010
When Techies Attack: Act 3
The army of techies hid quietly behind the new sets, waiting. They were all equipped with their tape and flashlights. They heard the stage door creak open, the ruckus of the actors entering the theater. The dressing room door opened and slammed shut.
"What's this?" "Where is my costume?" "Techie!" "Techie!" "I need a techie!" "I don't understand!" "What's going on?"
Mike laughed at their hopelessness. He grabbed a microphone and said clearly, "The costumes are marked. Put the one on that has your name inside."
It took a while, but eventually the actors filed out on stage, all with uncomfortable looks on their faces. Every single one was grumbling about how it didn't fit, or the color didn't go with their complexion, or it looked like there should be a hat, or something else ridiculous. They stopped when they could see the stage.
"What is this?" Demanded Alexis, the head diva. She was never the star, but thought she should be and supposedly that gave her all the right to bitch out. "These aren't our sets. These aren't our costumes. What is going on? Is anyone else even here?"
Mike took the microphone again and stated, "Oh you're not alone. And these are your sets and costumes. Sure, they may not be what you worked with before, but they're what you've got now. Make it work."
"It's not my job to make it work, that's the tech crew's job!"
"NOW!" Mike yelled in fury.
The techies jumped from behind unfamiliar sets and began the attack. Mike took on Alexis as his own. He whipped out his tape like the pro he was, but he couldn't get to her arms before she started shaking him. She switched to pulling his hair and then finished by throwing him across the stage.
"That's it! No more!" He got up and ran at her. "You are a horrible actress!" With that he shined his flashlight right in her eyes.
"NO! I'm melting! Melting!"
"I don't believe it. Where is the inflection?" He smirked and taped her mouth shut.
The other actors stopped and stared in awe at Mike. An ensemble member stepped forward and said shyly, "You stopped her." She turned to the crowd and declared, "we are free!"
All the actors cheered and hugged the nearest techie. Finally the diva's dictatorship was over and the actors all had their free spirits back.
"Wait!" Mike shouted. "Just because the diva is gone, this doesn't mean your going to stop abusing us. We know what you're capable of!"
"We only did what we did because she pressured us. Can you help us learn how to do the tech stuff too?"
"Yeah, can you? Please?" More and more voices were chiming in until Mike collapsed under their pleading.
"Fine. From this day forth, everyone that steps foot on this stage will be bitechtual!"
And so it was. The techies trained the actors, and the actors trained the techies. The Great Tech Revolution happened farther than anyone can remember, but we all know this is the story. This is the way things always were, and always shall be! And the moral of the story? Techies are people too! Goodbye and goodnight, my dear friends and readers. Love to all!
<3 CNM
"What's this?" "Where is my costume?" "Techie!" "Techie!" "I need a techie!" "I don't understand!" "What's going on?"
Mike laughed at their hopelessness. He grabbed a microphone and said clearly, "The costumes are marked. Put the one on that has your name inside."
It took a while, but eventually the actors filed out on stage, all with uncomfortable looks on their faces. Every single one was grumbling about how it didn't fit, or the color didn't go with their complexion, or it looked like there should be a hat, or something else ridiculous. They stopped when they could see the stage.
"What is this?" Demanded Alexis, the head diva. She was never the star, but thought she should be and supposedly that gave her all the right to bitch out. "These aren't our sets. These aren't our costumes. What is going on? Is anyone else even here?"
Mike took the microphone again and stated, "Oh you're not alone. And these are your sets and costumes. Sure, they may not be what you worked with before, but they're what you've got now. Make it work."
"It's not my job to make it work, that's the tech crew's job!"
"NOW!" Mike yelled in fury.
The techies jumped from behind unfamiliar sets and began the attack. Mike took on Alexis as his own. He whipped out his tape like the pro he was, but he couldn't get to her arms before she started shaking him. She switched to pulling his hair and then finished by throwing him across the stage.
"That's it! No more!" He got up and ran at her. "You are a horrible actress!" With that he shined his flashlight right in her eyes.
"NO! I'm melting! Melting!"
"I don't believe it. Where is the inflection?" He smirked and taped her mouth shut.
The other actors stopped and stared in awe at Mike. An ensemble member stepped forward and said shyly, "You stopped her." She turned to the crowd and declared, "we are free!"
All the actors cheered and hugged the nearest techie. Finally the diva's dictatorship was over and the actors all had their free spirits back.
"Wait!" Mike shouted. "Just because the diva is gone, this doesn't mean your going to stop abusing us. We know what you're capable of!"
"We only did what we did because she pressured us. Can you help us learn how to do the tech stuff too?"
"Yeah, can you? Please?" More and more voices were chiming in until Mike collapsed under their pleading.
"Fine. From this day forth, everyone that steps foot on this stage will be bitechtual!"
And so it was. The techies trained the actors, and the actors trained the techies. The Great Tech Revolution happened farther than anyone can remember, but we all know this is the story. This is the way things always were, and always shall be! And the moral of the story? Techies are people too! Goodbye and goodnight, my dear friends and readers. Love to all!
<3 CNM
Saturday, April 10, 2010
When Techies Attack: Act 2
Mike paced back and forth in front of a crowd of techies, flashlight in hand.
"Listen to me," he said, "the actors are the enemy. Defeating them should be easy, however they are well trained in stage combat so we may face some difficulties. If you get a chance to tape down their arms, all they'll have are their jazz squares. Trip them and they don't stand a chance. Here's the plan, tonight we switch out their costumes and swap the sets. Tomorrow, we fight. These are your weapons." He held up his flashlight and a toll of tech tape. "Use them wisely. Now go! We have a lot of work to do!"
The army of techies scattered as Mike shooed them away. He stood in silence on the empty stage and smiled. It was almost time. Finally, once and for all, the techies would reign triumphant.
"Listen to me," he said, "the actors are the enemy. Defeating them should be easy, however they are well trained in stage combat so we may face some difficulties. If you get a chance to tape down their arms, all they'll have are their jazz squares. Trip them and they don't stand a chance. Here's the plan, tonight we switch out their costumes and swap the sets. Tomorrow, we fight. These are your weapons." He held up his flashlight and a toll of tech tape. "Use them wisely. Now go! We have a lot of work to do!"
The army of techies scattered as Mike shooed them away. He stood in silence on the empty stage and smiled. It was almost time. Finally, once and for all, the techies would reign triumphant.
Thursday, April 1, 2010
When Techies Attack: Act 1
Mike sat in the booth alone in the darkness, plotting his revenge. He absolutely resented the way those ignorant actors were always screaming, "Tech, tech, techies!!!" How very dare they insult his trade! Mike could act if he wanted to, he just didn't want to. His forefinger absent mindedly stroked the sound board. When faced with a technical problem, he was always prepared and the stupid actors had no idea what to do. All they could do in a time of crisis was call for someone else to take care of them. Actors are helpless, hopeless even.
As a devoted techie, Mike was sick of them all. "Get me a water!" "How does this thingy work?" "Is my mic working?" "Do you know where my prop is?" "How does this costume look?"
AAHHHH! No! Figure it out yourself! Did you even turn it on? Your prop is your own problem! Why should I care how you look? I'm done! It is time for the revolution my friends!
Mike decided once and for all to assemble his tech army and attack. He locked the booth and left in silence, a sly grin taking over his chiseled features. This was just the beginning.
As a devoted techie, Mike was sick of them all. "Get me a water!" "How does this thingy work?" "Is my mic working?" "Do you know where my prop is?" "How does this costume look?"
AAHHHH! No! Figure it out yourself! Did you even turn it on? Your prop is your own problem! Why should I care how you look? I'm done! It is time for the revolution my friends!
Mike decided once and for all to assemble his tech army and attack. He locked the booth and left in silence, a sly grin taking over his chiseled features. This was just the beginning.
Wednesday, March 31, 2010
Dickens
In the spirit of Charles Dickens, I willbe publishing stories chapter by chapter on this blog. Some will be just one post, while others will be ongoing stories. Some tales will be based on real life, and other will not be. It's your best guess as to which ones. Read, enjoy, comment, post, ask questions, tell your friends.
<3 CNM
<3 CNM
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